Pop quiz today, boys and girls.
1. You install a new 92% efficient gas furnace. You preset the thermostat to come on only in the morning and in the late afternoons. Your house has limited insulation, many large windows, and two doors without proper weather sealing. How cold will the house be when you arrive home from work? How long will it take to reach room temperature?
2. You buy a house without a bathtub. How many baths do you get to take during your first six months in the house? How much does a bathroom remodel cost? How soon can you start the project?
3a. It is Wednesday. Book group is on Saturday. Brideshead Revisited is 351 pages long, of which you have read seventeen. How many pages remain to be read? Will you finish?
3b. You read approximately 50 pages per hour, regardless of the subject matter. How many hours should you schedule to finish Brideshead Revisited? Will you finish?
3c. You plan to watch two hours of televlision tonight, and tomorrow your sister-in-law flies in for a visit. On Saturday, your brother-in-law flies in. Now will you finish?
4. The World of Warcraft beta goes live. To play, you must download a 2.42gb install file from the internet. You download 81.5mb during the first hour, but have to surrender your ethernet cable so that actual work can get done. During the second hour, you download 64.9mb over your wireless connection. How long will it take to finish the download? What if you switch from wireless to ethernet when you go home at night?
5a. You read (audited?) Master and Commander in 13 days. You read Post Captain in 16 days. You read H.M.S. Suprise in 8 days. You read The Mauritius Command in 12 days. How long will it take you to read all twenty books in the series?
5b. You’re borrowing the O’Brian books from the public library. The library allows you to borrow them for 28 days. (You’re allowed to renew an item if there are no holds on it, but there are always holds on the O’Brian books.) How far in advance must you place a hold so that the next book is ready for you when you finish with the current book?
6. You decide to install two horseshoe pitches in your back yard. A regulation horseshoe pitch is 40 feet from stake to stake. A regulation pitch for women is 27 feet from stake to stake. The only space in which your wife will allow you to place the pitches has an irregular shape, about 28 feet long in one spot and about 34 feet long in the other. How many trees and bushes must you hack in order to create your horseshoe pitches?
7. You weigh 200 pounds. Six months ago you weighed 180 pounds. How many calories did you consume during those six months? How many Hostess Sno-Balls is that? How many hours of bicycling would it take to drop to 180 pounds again? How many Patrick O’Brian novels could you listen to during that time?
I’m in one of my periodic blue moods, an epoch of low self-esteem and self-loathing. Fortunately, Kris is there to lend support. And I’ve got my Simon and Garfunkel to listen to. I’m playing “Old Friends” and “America” over and over again. Simon and Garfunkel carried me through many days and nights of teenage angst. Now I find they’re able to carry me through the days and nights of middle-age angst.
I’ll be my normal cheery self again soon. I promise.
On 10 November 2004 (09:17 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (09:22 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (09:27 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (10:32 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (10:42 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (11:17 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (11:23 AM),
On 10 November 2004 (12:04 PM),
On 10 November 2004 (12:14 PM),
Amy Jo said:
On 10 November 2004 (02:12 PM),
On 10 November 2004 (03:16 PM),
Mom (Sue) said:
On 11 November 2004 (07:08 AM),
On 11 November 2004 (07:43 AM),
On 11 November 2004 (08:03 AM),
On 11 November 2004 (08:16 AM),